Hasta La Ideas

All Unitasker Wednesday posts are jokes — we don’t want you to buy these items, we want you to laugh at their ridiculousness. Enjoy!

This week’s unitasker is specifically for our England-based readers. Sure, you’re across the pond, but that doesn’t seem to keep you free from lovely items such as:

Yes, it’s a USB microwave from Heinz. The Beanzawave is perfect for the office worker who is chained to his desk:

The mini-micro has been designed by microwave expert Gordon Andrews and Stephen Frazer, an authority on industrial design and managng director of Frazer Designers.

Apart from its size, the key breakthrough is the use of a combination of mobile phone radio frequencies to create the heat to cook both on the outside and within in under a minute.

Mr Andrews, the managing director of GAMA Microwave Technology, said it is possible to ‘tune’ the radio-frequencies to provide the best results with any small product.

‘It is possible to heat a pie, a burger, a cup of soup or tea in quick time,’ he said.

‘There is the option of powering it with lithium ion batteries that would make it completely portable, which would be a help to fishermen, campers or sportsmen.’

I don’t know what is creepier, the fact that a worker doesn’t have enough time to leave his desk to eat a meal or that this thing cooks using mobile phone radio frequencies. Well, um, thankfully it’s not yet for sale and only looking to be manufactured in England.

Special thanks to my college pal Adam at Serious Eats for giving me a head’s up about this product.