Cover Your Old Car Personality With 'New Car Smell' Cologne
Posted in: UncategorizedWant to seem like you’re into cars, without having to actually give a damn about cars?* Ally Financial debuted some conceptual “New Car Smell” scent options at this year’s NAIAS that might be able to help you out.
Their fine line of auto-themed scents first showed up at last year’s Detroit Auto show, where it drew bigger crowds than an auto financing vendor’s booth should be able to. This year the presentation included custom scent demonstrations by a professional comedy-scent mixologist, and the unveiling of two thrilling new arrivals based on industry trends:
The Future: 47% Hard Drive, 27% Laptop, 19% GPS, 7% Sandwich
Smell that? It’s the future. Where you don’t drive cars—they drive you. Sure, its intelligence is artificial, but its fragrance is as natural as it gets. So inhale the intoxicating aroma of modern technology, people. And buckle up.
Luxury Coupe: 67% Plush leather, 28% Shoe Polish, 4% Caviar, 1%
Benjamins Hire a chauffeur and load up on lobster: you’ve arrived. Enjoy the refined air of the 1%. The road is your red carpet, pedestrians your paparazzi. Don’t spare the horses, Jeeves.
Previous options include stinks like the needlessly gendered “Pickup Truck” and “City Compact” which boast notes of “beard” and “lipstick” respectively. But regardless of other auto industry trends, I’m going to take it as a sign that “The Future” is gender neutral.
*I’m not sure why you would, unless you’re trying to steal my job.
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