Columnist Recalls Her Experiences with ‘Lesbian Ping-Pong’

Do yourself a favor and be sure to read Hinda Gonchor’s second column for the East Hampton Star. Although with a headline like “Lesbian Ping-Pong,” maybe you’ve already beaten us to this content punch.

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Gonchor, now in her 70s, divides her time between East Hampton and New York City. In the piece, she recalls how at age 60 she became part of a weekly NYC ping-pong league. A league that was not fully explained to her at the time of the initial invite:

Sunday two-to-five rolled around and I showed up. I saw about 30 women, some playing, some observing. I observed this: These women were all gay. I wasn’t. I became panicky, but so electrifying was the ping and pong from the tables, I ignored my anxiety. I decided on a reverse “don’t ask, don’t tell” approach.

Most of the players had short hair; wore mannish trousers; no makeup. My M.O., purple nail polish and bright red lipstick, was a definite no-no, so the following week I showed up plain. I was desperate to blend in. It took time. I kept to myself, spoke when spoken to, played fair; went overboard favoring my opponent when there was a score dispute. I suffered in silence.

The rest of the column is flat-out hilarious. If you enjoy the piece as much as we did, may we suggest a few other nuggets beyond her inaugural East Hampton Star contribution “The Good Mother-in-Law:”

On a Steady Diet of Not Going on a Diet
[New York Times; December 27, 1981]

Metropolitan Diary
[New York Times; February 19, 1986]

Metropolitan Diary
[New York Times; November 18, 1987]

Letter to the editor
[New York Times; September 16, 1986]

By the way, Gonchor’s 1981 NYT item contains the following passage. Read today, the observation is a reminder that some media things never change:

The pressure to look thinner, younger, more beautiful imposed on me by every branch of the American media (ceaselessly preying on my insecurities) had to be stopped. How long must I go on taking those ”10 steps to a better me?” When am I going to be all right already?

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